A Rascal House Pizza Box Opens Up About Life On The Road
April 15th, 2018 by Rascal M
Hey everyone! My name is Pizza Box. As you all know, Rascal House is filled with great people who work hard every day to bring you a different kind of experience. But did you know there are some manmade heroes who work here whose work sometimes goes unnoticed? Yeah, no kidding. There’s Pizza Cutter. There’s Cheese Grater. Let’s see, who else? Oh, there’s me! Sit back and relax while I tell you my story. But don’t you go falling in love with my job. I intend to milk my stay here for as long as possible.
I’ve been everywhere in Cleveland. But that shouldn’t surprise you. I carry precious cargo and make people happy. Not bad for a guy who started off as a piece of cardboard. I’m responsible for all the stampedes that take place at parties and company outings. Your significant other stops listening to you whenever I enter a room. I’m sorry about that. But you yourself can’t even look at me without drooling. See what I mean.
Along my sides I have more tats than everyone in the NBA. See what this says? Seriously Substantial Overstuffed Subs. This is what happens when you work for a different kind of pizza place. That one right there, the one that says Ooey Gooey Desserts? I got that because nothing tastes better with Pepperoni Extreme Bellybusters than Chocolate Chip Jumbo Cookies, baked fresh daily in our ovens.
I’m engineered for speed and temperature control. Like a Ferrari, but with more yummy under the hood. I’d race for NASCAR, but everyone’s afraid I’d “box” them in. See, even boxes have a sense of humor. But there’s no funny business when I’m carrying pizza. I’m where you need me to be — fast and still hot from the oven. It’s easy when you’re hotter than One Direction. But like I always tell my fans, “it’s not what’s on the outside of me that makes me hot. It’s what’s inside!”
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